Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

COLOSSIANS 3:19KJV
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Colossians 3:19 (KJV)

What does Colossians 3:19 mean?

Colossians 3:19 instructs husbands to love their wives and not to be harsh or resentful toward them. This verse calls for a caring, gentle attitude from husbands, specifically warning against bitterness in the marriage relationship.

Paul is writing to believers in Colossae, giving practical guidance for Christian households. In this section, he addresses husbands directly, emphasizing that love should shape their actions and attitudes toward their wives. The warning against bitterness highlights that love is not just about feelings but also about how husbands treat their wives day-to-day.

The Greek behind Colossians 3:19

  • The word for "love" is ἀγαπάω (agapaō), which often refers to a self-giving, committed kind of love, not just affection or attraction. This points to a steady, purposeful care that goes beyond emotion.
  • The word for "bitter" is πικραίνω (pikrainō), which can mean to become embittered, harsh, or resentful. The instruction is not just about avoiding open anger but also about not letting harshness or resentment build up inside.

Why Colossians 3:19 matters

  • Colossians 3:19 clarifies that biblical love in marriage is active and intentional, not just a feeling or romantic attraction.
  • The verse corrects any idea that authority in marriage allows for harshness or emotional distance; instead, it insists on kindness and patience.
  • This instruction fits into a larger section where Paul describes how faith in Christ should shape every relationship, showing that Christian living starts at home.

Where else these words appear

“be” Greek G4087 · used in 4 verses

  • Revelation 8:11 And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter.
  • Revelation 10:9 And I went unto the angel, and said unto him, Give me the little book. And he said unto me, Take it, and eat it up; and it shall make thy belly bitter, but it shall be in thy mouth sweet as honey.
  • Revelation 10:10 And I took the little book out of the angel's hand, and ate it up; and it was in my mouth sweet as honey: and as soon as I had eaten it, my belly was bitter.

“love” Greek G25 · used in 109 verses

  • Matthew 5:43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.
  • John 15:9 As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love.
  • 2 Timothy 4:8 Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing.